I had a conversation with my daughter Kelsey the other day about “Influencers” on social media. As we talked about how they seem to be quite confident in what they share and seem to believe. Some of the influencers are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the same church we belong to. These are good people, and they sometimes have a large following, but they’re views and what they do is not always the view of the church, exactly. They sometimes don’t follow all the teachings, completely. Some are even upset about something the church or its leaders have said, and they share that on their platform. I’m a believer in agency and the freedom to choose. I know others don’t always agree with what the church teaches, but when my daughter and I talked, we both agreed the best place to learn about The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is from an official representative, missionaries, leaders, and those who are called to share the true gospel teachings. If you got your feelings hurt, or an older mentor told you something and it’s not correct, you shouldn’t be sharing that information if it’s not true. That being said, you can’t change others.
The 6th question in the temple recommend interview is this:
- Do you follow the teachings of the Church of Jesus Christ in your private and public behavior with members of your family and others?
Russell M Nelson said, “Individual worthiness requires a total conversion of mind and heart to be more like the Lord.”
Are you an example? What about an Influencer? Influencer: one who exerts influence : a person who inspires or guides the actions of others.
Aren’t we all- Influencers? Whether we influence others to do what’s right or not.
I want to tell you about two of the most Christlike influencers I know: My parents. My Daddy was not a member of the church until he was a 20 year old in the army, stationed at the Presidio in San Francisco. He joined the church, because he was influenced by another soldier who was a member and who gave him a copy of the Book of Mormon. My Mama grew up a member of the church in Salt Lake City, and was on an adventure working and living with girlfriends in San Francisco. They met at church and shortly after fell in love.
After marriage they moved to Utah. All the while living the gospel, and being amazing. They raised a big family by today’s standards, 6 kids. Five boys and one girl. That’s me.
All parents know that the job is tough. We do our best, but we’re not perfect. My three older brothers struggled living what my parents taught, but were never left out or not included. The influence and love my parents showed was beautiful, and consistent.
I want to tell you about one brother, Keith. He was an alcoholic, a smoker, and a drug addict for most of his adult (young) life. He was finally jailed for a DUI, and would call my parents often begging through tears for them to come get him, all while the parent not talking to him would help the one talking to him be strong. “You need to be there”, they’d say. He was there for 5-6 months. While waiting for the court date, Dad wrote a letter to the judge asking to please be lenient with his ruling and let Keith be released with time served and come home. He could have gone to prison. Thankfully, he was released with an ankle bracelet and allowed to come home to my wonderful parents’ influence and love. FYI there isn’t alcohol, cigarettes or drugs at the county jail. He was clean the day he was released. Maybe seeing his life for the first time since his teen years, sober. The pull of my parents’ love would prove to be greater than the pull of his previous lifestyle. He was able to stay sober and became completely active in the church. He married in the temple, and served in whatever calling he was given. Guess what? He became a righteous influencer to all who knew his previous life. He became a positive influencer because my parents were a positive influence to him. One remaining challenge from using needles with drugs, he had contracted Hep C. His liver began to fail. We were so worried and sad. He had just cleaned up his life! But we all prayed for a miracle. It happened and through a very generous donation Keith received a liver from a donor who had died in a car crash.
My parents provided Sunday Dinner every week for most of our adult lives for all the extended family. All were invited and most of the time everyone would come. On occasion my kids would see one of my older brothers smoking out in front of the house. They knew it wasn’t a good thing, and they’d come tell me in a very worried voice. I’d say, “yes your uncle smokes, but that’s not who he is. We love him no matter what he does.”
My parents went through so much worry with kids whose choices were not what they wanted for them, but their love for them was always greater.
Even if we understand the idea that we should love people, we sometimes think we’re supposed to love them back onto our path instead of respecting their own journey. I’m not trying to love people into coming with me. I’m just loving people. No expectations, no transaction. They and God will figure out their journey; my job is to love them along the way. -Steve Young
Now, back to my brother Keith. He did great for a while, loving and serving and blessing lots of people, and living as a follower of Christ. He found out that he had throat cancer in 2019, then glioblastoma (brain cancer) in 2020, and passed away in January of 2021.
I have lost all three of my older brothers, now. They all died young. Their choices and lifestyles quite possibly could have played a part in that. But they always knew they were loved and could receive help at any time from Mom and Dad. The lesson is this. Our job is not to judge. Our job is not to choose for another. Our job is to live the gospel of Jesus Christ in our homes and in our community and in the world. We are all influencers. Living the gospel is the right thing to do, and being a righteous influencer as a result of it is wonderful. I want my legacy to be that I loved everyone, and that I was an example of a believer. When you love, it doesn’t mean you agree, it means you honor their right to choose for themselves. It means we love our non-member or inactive neighbor. It means we continue in faith even when the world is in turmoil.
2 Nephi 31:19 …after ye have gotten into this strait and narrow apath, I would ask if all is bdone?
20 Wherefore, ye must press forward with a asteadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of bhope, and a clove of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and dendure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eeternal life.
Jesus said, “Love everyone, treat them kindly too. When your heart is filled with love… (you’ll feel good and true.)” I’m so thankful for the most wonderful influencers in my life, my parents. For their example and influence that has blessed me with the desire to “follow the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ in my private and public behavior, with family and others.“