Struggles.

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I hesitate to write this post.

I know, I know, “our joyful nest” is supposed to be “a happy place to be”, but I’m sorry to say it’s not always the happiest. It’s not the saddest either. It’s just normal life, with it’s ups and downs.

I knew when we moved a few months ago that there might be some struggles for me emotionally. I don’t mind small changes and I usually cope well with them, but big changes sometimes throw me for a loop.

I have officially been thrown for a loop.

I’m not one to share complaints, or go on and on about my challenges. I do have a tendency to stay a little more quiet, and try to work through it by myself, but I wanted to give an explanation for my lack of posting lately.

Struggle #1

Depression. I am a woman named “Joy” who struggles with depression. It’s just wrong…:}. Or at least it seems like something a person like me would never deal with. I have been told by many people once I tell them, they “can’t believe it.” I have learned to cope through the years, but sometimes I have to work harder than ever to make it past a snag. Like moving out of a house I’ve lived in for 18 years and having all of my children move out on their own at the same time.

Struggle #2

I absolutely love my children, like most mothers do, so having them not live with me anymore is a lonesome thing. At the same time, I know it is good for them to grow up and I love living as empty nesters with my darling sweet hubsy. I still worry about them, and wonder what time they got home on a Friday night.

Struggle #3

Too much to do, not enough time to do it in. This never seems to change.

So of course life continues and I am still learning. Some days I am struggling very much with even leaving the house. I do it anyway, and I pretend a lot on those days.

I thought since I just spilled my guts that I would tell you some of the things I do to cope with these struggles.

Coping with #1

Depression.

First of all I am on medication for depression. I lovingly call it my “happy” pill.

I never miss it!

I have tried many different medications through the years and this one works for me. I still feel the effects of depression to a certain extent, and I know I need it. I have weaned myself off before and could not stop crying, so I went back on it.

I learned that sugar is a “no, no” for me and so I am very careful with my sugar consumption.

I take vitamins, and eat lots of healthy food. Green things and natural things.

I get at least 7-8 hours of sleep a night.

I attend church on a regular basis and pray always, believing with all my heart that the Savior can help me live my life to the fullest, and that He knows me and what I’m dealing with in my life. It is faith that helps me when I have negative thoughts come to my mind. I know certain things like: I am a wonderful person who is very blessed. I have family that loves and supports me and I can do hard things. I repeat in my mind that I know this, when my feelings tell me “you suck”, “no one cares”. or “God doesn’t get you”.

Gratitude! I am constantly reminding myself of all the blessings I have, even dealing with depression and struggles is a blessing.

The best thing I do to cope is to forget myself. In the middle of all of the things I feel sad about, I get busy loving someone who is worse off than me, someone who is struggling more. Sometimes I can’t do this, but I do what I can to move past the sadness. This works for me. It may not work for everyone.

Oh, I almost forgot...laugh! I have mentioned before in other posts that I laugh really easy. This is truly a blessing to me. If I’m really struggling I can watch a movie or read something that makes me laugh. 🙂

I even listen to uplifting music. This helps a ton.

I believe that we owe it to those we love and who love us to be our best self. It is not fun to live with a grumpy, sad person. I don’t want to be that person to those I love, so I do my best to be my best self.

Coping with #2

I absolutely love my children.

So this is a similar way to cope as with #1, because I do a lot of self talk.

I love my children, and I love to be with them as much as possible. They love me too, but their not supposed to be spending a lot of time with their mom and dad. They’re supposed to be living their own life. They work, go to school, date, and my oldest is supposed to be spending time with his family.

If they are doing their own thing, that is good!!!

Some people have a hard time getting their kids to leave “the nest”, we should be happy that they are happy to leave! “Yay! We did a good thing, we raised them and taught them to be independent, responsible adults, and to live on their own.”

I feel sad for a minute and talk to myself and then get busy doing something else.

Coping with #3

Too much to do, not enough time to do it in.

I can’t believe I still struggle with this… really! I love to get things done. I am a list person. I love to make lists of the things I need to get done and then check each item off as I do them. The problem is I always try to put too much into each day, and then I’m bummed when I don’t complete the list. Dur!!!

I have to remind myself… it’s ok to take your time.

Like my son Alex said “Remember, ‘Slow and Steady wins the race!'”

Read the post, here!

So…now you know more about me than you ever wanted to know. I hope in some small way that what I have said is helpful to someone out there.

We are all children of a loving Heavenly Father. He sent His son to show us by example how to live. He atoned for our sins and because of this we can always do better. We mean everything to Him. You mean everything to Him!!

and I love you!

“Have courage for the great sorrows of life, and patience for the small ones. And when you have finished your daily task, go to sleep in peace. God is awake.” -Victor Hugo

Missionary Monday: Sister S. in Missouri!

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I love the peace that you can find in the temple! It almost brings me to tears of joy. It also is so nice to see so many friends and friendly faces! This week was great!
And there was also a special surprise. Elder and Sister Holland and their family came to the Liberty Jail around 8am on July 16th. We got a call around 9 from Sister G. telling us that he was here and he wanted to greet us! Sister S. and I headed over as quickly as we could. Smiling face with smiling eyes We all stood in a line at the front. When they were finished in the rotunda, we were able to meet the family. Elder Holland wanted to shake all of our hands, but he apologized for being in his pday clothes (a blue checkered button up shirt, blue pants, and sandals.) He kept reaching for his unbuttoned collar, you could tell he preferred to do this in a suit. He shook all our hands, Sister S. and I were last. When he shook my hand he said, “Where did you get your hair?! Flaming, just flaming!”Smiling face with smiling eyes Sister Holland also gave us all hugs, she was just so sweet, and she also admired my hair! Smiling face with smiling eyesWhen they were about to leave he decided that he wanted to take a picture with us, usually he doesn’t do that unless he is in a suit, so, to hide the fact that he wasn’t properly dressed he said he would stand behind us. He said that they had to take a picture with these beautiful Sisters. Wow, what a neat and special experience! It was an answer to my prayer,”Heavenly Father, if Elder Holland comes, all I want is to be able to shake his hand. That would mean so much to me.” Smiling face with smiling eyes
Also this week I received a revelation that I thought I would share! While I was in the second narration I received some revelation. There was a group that had just come from the Navoo pageant I was reminded of all those who come to protest at things like that. All the anti and all the bashing, etc.. As I was there in the second narration, where Joseph and the other prisoners were brought to the jail, It really solidified the fact that truth will always be opposed. (There was a huge group of people who had gathered to see these “monster like” men. As Joseph was entering the jail he turned to the crowd and said, “Good afternoon gentleman.”) I have thought about that in the second narration before, but it never hit me quite like that before. As I shared what stood out to me, more came. Truth will always be opposed, we are seeing evidence of that all over. We will be asked to stand up for those truths that we hold dear. As we do that we can, and should, respond like Joseph. We should respond with kindness, love, and compassion; we should respond like our Savior. We can and should be Christ-like. D&C 123:17 “Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed.” Our investigator really wants to be baptized! We are just trying to work out a few details so that we can have him on a specific date. He asked our bishop if he would perform the ordinance! We also are trying to see if we can still teach them because they are moving to another town. Fingers crossed!

Well I love you all so much! I know that the Church is true! I Know that our Savior lives, and I love getting to share that testimony on a daily basis. This really is the best thing I could have done. I am so grateful that I followed the spirit and came  on a mission. The Lord really has blessed me so much! I love you all!!!
Mucho Love! Smiling face with smiling eyes Sister S.

Family History Friday: Mormon Migration

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I found a wonderful site to help with your search if you have Mormon ancestry. It’s called “Mormon Migration” you can find it here.

“About 90,000 Latter-day Saint converts crossed the oceans during the 19th century, heeding a call to come to Zion, to “be gathered in unto one place” (D&C 29:7). The first company of Saints gathered to Zion in 1840, followed by a continual flow of immigrants over the next decades. Immigration, after conversion, was considered the fruit of a faithful Saint. Church leaders de-emphasized convert immigration to America at the close of the 19th century, and during the 20th century The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints constructed chapels and encouraged converts to build Zion in their homelands.”

There are all kinds of records at this site, with many search options!

Check it out, and just have fun with it. It is so interesting to me, even if I don’t find any of my ancestors, I just have so much fun looking through the information.  You can enter dates, and it will pull up all of the ships that sailed within the dates you set. You can also view the original passenger lists. I love it!

Happy Family History Friday! Love, Joy

The Best Remedy!

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The best remedy for those who are afraid,

lonely or unhappy is to go outside, 

Somewhere where they can be quiet,

Alone with the heavens, 

Nature and God

Because only then does one feel

That all is as it should be

And that God wishes to see people happy, 

Amidst the simple beauty of nature. 

-Anne Frank

 A few weeks ago in church one of the young women shared an experience she had at girls camp. They rowed in a boat out to the middle of a beautiful lake. When they got to the middle, the leaders asked them to sit silently for a few minutes. They asked the girls to think, look, and listen. After the few minutes were up, some of the girls had tears in their eyes. They could feel something sweet and powerful. A message from God that they are loved. Then they sang a song called, “I Feel My Saviors Love.” All of the girls were crying now. They really could feel their Saviors Love.

I have had that same feeling out in nature.

I am so grateful for this beautiful earth!

Go for a hike, go to the park and lay on the ground beneath a tree and watch the branches move with the breeze, or even a ride in the car through the canyon or past a lake.

We are so blessed!!!

Sunday Best!

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“We must flood the earth and our lives with the Book of Mormon. We each need to get our testimony of the Book of Mormon through the Holy Ghost. Then our testimony, coupled with the Book of Mormon, should be shared with others so that they, too, can know through the Holy Ghost of its truthfulness.”

-Ezra Taft Benson

I taught a lesson today “Flooding the earth and our lives with the Book of Mormon, and when I first heard President Benson say “flood,” I was thinking flooding ins’t a good thing. So I thought, what did he mean? Then I thought of irrigation, and how the land is flooded and after that happens the plants grow. It is a good thing, in this context. President Benson was the US Secretary of Agriculture. He was a farmer, and that’s what farmers do.

I used the analogy of the jar with rocks that Stephen Covey used to use in his time management seminars. He starts off with rocks, gravel, and sand on the table. He asked the helper he calls from the audience if they can get all of it in the jar. They can’t do it. Then Stephen has them put the large rocks in, then the gravel, then the sand, then he has them add water. You think there’s no way that it will all fit, but it does. I think in this analogy the water could represent the Book of Mormon. If we add it to our lives (let it flood our lives), even if our lives are full and busy, then it will bless and touch everything we do and make it wonderful.

I enjoyed so much teaching today, and I love the Book of Mormon and know it is true. If you want to know more about the Book of Mormon go here!

Hope your Sunday was the Best! Love, Joy

Weigh This?

Powerful!

Why do we always measure ourselves by the weight of our bodies? Or the size of our “whatever,” or how strong or physically fit we look?

If we focus on our accomplishments and not the things we don’t like about ourselves, we will feel much better and love ourselves.

If we focus on our looks, or what we may think is not good about our looks, which by the way, usually isn’t a problem anyway, we’re just being hard on ourselves, we’re focusing on the wrong things,

So I challenge you to share five things with someone your love, about yourself that are lovable, and/or a challenge that you made it through, or an accomplishment!

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Here’s my list:

1-I have naturally curling hair that is beautiful.

2-I am a happy, positive person almost all the time.

3-I have been married for 30 years to my most favorite person on the planet.

4-I raised 4 amazing children.

5-I give hugs all the time.

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“As you get older you will understand more and more that it’s not about what you look like or what you own, it’s al about the person you’ve become.” -unknown

Sunday Best!

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“Sir, my concern is not whether God is on our side; my greatest concern is to on God’s side, for God is always right.” -Abraham Lincoln

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 My country, ’tis of thee,
Sweet land of liberty,
Of thee I sing;
Land where my fathers died,
Land of the pilgrims’ pride,
From ev’ry mountainside
Let freedom ring!

 My native country, thee,
Land of the noble free,
Thy name I love;
I love thy rocks and rills,
Thy woods and templed hills.
My heart with rapture thrills
Like that above.

 Let music swell the breeze
And ring from all the trees
Sweet freedom’s song;
Let mortal tongues awake;
Let all that breathe partake;
Let rocks their silence break,
The sound prolong.

 Our fathers’ God, to thee,
Author of liberty,
To thee we sing;
Long may our land be bright
With freedom’s holy light.
Protect us by thy might,
Great God, our King!

Text: Samuel F. Smith, 1808-1895

Music: From Thesaurus Musicus, London, 1744

God Bless America, my home sweet home.

Hope your Sunday is the Best! Love, Joy